First Time
by InsideYourDreams24
Summary: Carlisle has never tasted human blood in his life... when a sick boy is left an orphan, will he be able to save him? Carlisle's POV on turning Edward in 1918, also Carlisle's POV to Always Forever.
1. Save Him

**A/N: Wow, goodness. I haven't written anything for Twilight in a loong time. Do I even still have Twilight followers? Haha. This is just something that I found on my ipod and figured that I should finish and post it, even though I haven't really been into Twilight as much lately. **

**This is Carlisle's POV to "Always Forever", or Carlisle's POV to turning Edward in 1918.**

**Please review!**

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_The bigger they are, the harder they fall... _

I entered the quarantine room, my heart heavy. I usually enjoyed my work, but nowadays so many were dying it seemed like there was nothing I could do. The deep mahogany walls were moldy and covered in dust since no one besides me had dared to stay around the isolation patients. The patients here almost never survived; they were the ones that had gotten the worst of the flu. I walked over to a patient that I had become dangerously close to, Elizabeth Masen. She was an amazing woman, so selfless and strong-willed that she had lasted longer than any of the doctors had expected. However, her husband and son were not so lucky. Edward Sr. had died hours after stumbling into the hospital, and their boy, Edward Jr., was barely holding on to life on the cot next to his mother's. He was in such bad condition, I doubted that he would last even another two or three days.

I stood over Elizabeth's bed to check up on her. Even in the hands of death, there was no denying that she was beautiful. Her copper-bronze hair waved out behind her head, her pale jaw set in a permanently determined expression. She did not seem any better than yesterday, but she did not seem any worse either, so I moved on to Edward. The poor boy looked so frail; his hair, the same odd bronze shade, had lost most of its shine, now matted down with sweat, tears, and grease. His mother would come over to him daily and try to nurse him back to health. I kept trying to tell her that she was only making it harder on herself, but she refused to listen to me. Edward breathed heavily, sweat running down his face. I placed a cold washcloth over his head and he instantly looked relieved. His condition was getting worse, I could tell. It would be heart-wrenching to lose him, his mother spoke so highly of Edward that I dearly wished he would get better. She constantly talked about his musical talent, of his charisma, of his intelligence; I wanted to see this boy survive. Make no mistake; he had regained consciousness a few times during their stay, but never for more than a few seconds.

I filled out my daily report for the two of them and left the room, somehow feeling worse than I did when I had entered. It just wasn't right when things like this happened to good people.

The next day, after a torturous waiting period of staying home doing nothing, I arrived early to continue working. I received some odd looks from the secretary that I rightly deserved for not staying home long enough, but I honestly didn't care anymore. After finding out that seven of my patients had died, and fourteen more had checked into the hospital, I sighed and went straight to work, diagnosing those who had the flu, finding out who was already too far gone for me to help them. It wasn't a pleasant day to start out, and unfortunately it was going to get much worse. As my shift drew to a closing, I went to check on the Masens before I left. As I walked into the room, I could instantly smell the blood that was filling Elizabeth's lungs. I ran over to her, her hand reaching up to grip mine, her deep emerald eyes staring at me with more strength that I would have thought she was capable of.

"Save him!" She whispered hoarsely, her voice ragged from the blood entering her lungs. I was upset that I would lose her like this, I had once thought that maybe she would be one of the few that overcame the flu. I held her hand tightly, not caring if she noticed how cold it was anymore.

"I will to everything in my power," I whispered back, but sadly I knew that no matter how many antibiotics and pain killers I gave him, her son would not even make it through the night. She stared me down, her piercing eyes making it almost uncomfortable,

"You must do everything in YOUR power. What others cannot do, that it what you must do for my Edward." I gasped, what was she saying? Did she know what I was? How could she? If I were human my heart would have skipped a beat as I realized the meaning of her words: she wanted me turn Edward. Why would she want that for her son? How did she know that I could save him? I didn't even think I could! I wanted to ask her more, but her hand fell around mine. And with a single breath, Elizabeth Masen's eyes closed, never to open again. Tears would have escaped down my cheeks had they been able to form, for I had come to love Elizabeth as a dear friend, and I hated seeing her conquered by the flu.

I walked over to the bed next to hers, finding Edward struggling to open his eyes. They were also the same shade as his mother's, except his had lost most of the life they originally had. He seemed more lifeless than his mother had been seconds before she died. I stared back at him, contemplating what Elizabeth had told me to do, her dying demand. I didn't even know if I COULD turn this boy, I'd never done it before. I had been considering making a companion for quite a while now, but I could never bring myself to do it. Was it right to condemn others to this life? I could never decide. But I remembered Elizabeth's fury, the determination I saw in her eyes as she entrusted me with her son. Edward was all alone now, no father, no mother, no one. I looked back at him, and I made up my mind.

I looked over at Elizabeth's body, still not peaceful even in death, and leaned forward close to Edward's ear, hoping not to be heard by the other nurses.

"I am truly sorry Edward," I breathed. And I was; I was sorry for the death of his mother, I was sorry for the pain he would go through, I was sorry that there was the possibility that I could kill him. One way or another, Edward Anthony Masen was going to die tonight. I leaned back and looked at the boy again, seeing all his goodness and purity. I knew that if it were possible for me to have a son, I would want him to be just like Edward. The fever in him took over as he lost consciousness again, his body shuddering again the virus that was tearing him apart. I had no time to lose, I took Elizabeth's body to the morgue, hating myself for not mourning her as long as I should, but her boy was not going to last very long.

I ran at a human pace back to their room to find Edward still alive, barely, thank God. I looked around to see if there were any nurse, then awkwardly lifted Edward up, cradling him in my arms like a child. I ran as fast as I could out of the hospital, leaping up onto the roof of a store and running Edward home across the rooftops of Chicago. I paused at my apartment building before running up the emergency stairs.

As I entered my room I suddenly realized I had no idea how to turn someone into a vampire. I placed Edward on my leather couch and paced back and forth, thinking back to when I had been turned. My memories were dulled with human eyesight and terror, but I could remember where the bites were made, most of them at least. The monster that turned me lost control while feeding; he had given me many bites that I later realized were not helpful in my transformation, and instead left shining marks on my chest and neck. I stiffened as I smelled blood begin to flow from Edward's nose, mouth, & ears. He was in the final stage of the influenza; there was no time to waste.

I knelt down by the boy who I hoped would come to be my son. I heaved a sigh, (I'd been sighing much more lately), trying to mentally prepare myself for what I was about to do. I placed my right hand on the head of the sofa, leaning in towards his neck until I was just above his jugular. The intense scent was already coating my mouth with venom. Without a second thought, I sank my teeth into his throat, a human throat, for the first time in my existence.

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**A/N: I do have a second part to this, if anyone would like to read it. Just say the word and I'll post it :) Thank you very much for reading! IYD24**


	2. Monster Inside Me

**A/N: Thank you very much to all those who reviewed, I had gotten nervous because somehow my e-mail notifications had gotten disabled without me knowing it and I thought that no one had done anything with it since I had posted. Not that I think that I'm Mr. Amazing-writer-that-has-to-get-reviews-on-every-story, but I hadn't even gotten an e-mail saying that I posted it, I was very confused :P But luckily I got everything straightened out.**

**Anywho, here is the second part, in my opinion it's better than the first, except for the end was a bit ad-libbed haha. Like I said in the first chapter, I just recently found this and another Twilight story on my ipod about 3 or 4 paragraphs from the end, so I really wanted to finish them. But you're not here to read my Author's Notes, so enjoy!**

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The blood was even better than I had ever imagined in all my newborn craving for it. I gasped as the warm liquid spilled over the cut in his neck and past my lips, running down my throat. The smell of it was absolutely intoxicating, not to mention the _taste_. The taste was magnificent, indescribable, inescapable. I greedily pressed my mouth to the boy's neck, wanting, no, _needing_ more of his precious blood. I felt him awaken under me with a startled gasp, his feeble hands grasped at my jacket. The close contact normally would have frightened me, but at this point it merely heightened the sense, the thrill of the hunt.

His gurgled scream jolted me back to reality with a shock, as I jumped back from his neck. A second later I almost screamed as an immense pain erupted in my stomach. It felt as though someone had come up to me and stabbed me repeatedly with a dull knife. My throat was scorching with the loss. I needed more blood, NOW. My eyes flickered to his wrist, all I could see were bright, individually pulsing arteries crossing each other at exactly the right spots for me to feed. I groaned as I tried to hold back my hunger, but my sane mind was losing as the animal that I knew resided in me burst forward, breaking through every chain and wall I had tried to build up.

I let out a primal snarl and leapt to his wrist. I grabbed his arm and bit down hastily. My reward was heavenly; the soothing blood ran down my throat, filling my gnawing stomach with pure bliss. I heard a faint gasp as I looked up to find the boy staring at me. His eyes were filled with confusion, terror, instinctive fear. I tried to see him but my eyes focused on the veins in his eyes, his head, his throat...

_No!_ I fought back a growl; I would not kill this boy! My hand gripped the head of the couch, tearing through the suddenly feeble fabric. I forced myself back from his wrist, my mouth and throat feeling like they were being torn apart. I looked up, gasping for breath I didn't need, only to hear the most luscious sound I had ever known. I heard his heart, beating hard with adrenaline and venom. Without thinking I attacked him once more. The blood was euphoric; the freshest taste since it was closest to the heart. I growled loudly, desperately trying to drink as quickly as possible. The frenzy was taking over. I couldn't control what I did anymore; I just need more of his blood so badly.

I hastily grabbed his other wrist. I snarled, my teeth raking up his forearm, letting the crimson blood stream down his arm as I pressed my lips to it. I couldn't get enough. I got frustrated, crazed with desire. I grabbed his hair in haste, yanking it back to expose more of his neck. He gave out a feeble whimper, but it was cut off as I dug into his neck, warmth surrounding my teeth. Again and again I bit down, noticing every single detail; how even the slightest change in placement made the blood taste differently, how easily my fingers and teeth could cut through his skin, how he shuddered under me, weaker and weaker as I overpowered him.

'_This boy is dying,'_ I thought idly. There was no emotion to it, no inference, just a statement. My throat burned with desire to drink until there was nothing left. I couldn't control myself. I jumped at his stomach, craving any amount of blood I could get my hands on. I needed it so badly. The boy's cries and shudders had cut off; his body was motionless underneath me.

He was going to die, because of _me._

This realization hit me like a cement wall. My eyes widened, I couldn't stop taking his blood. My breathing sped up as dread filled my mind. I wanted it so badly! But I would not kill him, I could not go through eternity knowing that I had murdered someone in cold blood, so to speak. I desperately tried to pull my self away as I kept drinking against my conscious will. It took all the strength that I was capable of as I broke away from his bloodstream with a huge gasp. I flung myself across the room, scrambling backwards to get as far away from him as I could.

I felt my back hit the dry wall; my back arching as I groaned loudly, the pain was inconceivable. I clenched my teeth as I fought against the thirst that begged me to return to feeding. I stayed there, on the floor, curled up in a ball, trying to forget the taste, the smell, the _existence _of human blood. Anything and my mind would snap, I would go back to being a thoughtless monster. After a long time, I started to overcome my torture. I was able to stand, and ran my hand through my hair. As my arm moved through the air, my peripheral vision caught sight of my reflection in a mirror. I turned to glance at myself, but what I saw made me wish I'd just been killed those 278 years ago.

I saw a monster, a true monster. My face was covered in blood that ran from my right eye down to the left side of my mouth. It was in my hair, around my eyes, I had several rivers of blood running down from my lips to my chin, staining my chest and neck with red. My shirt had torn at some parts, blood soaking the sleeves. My eyes were huge as I looked upon them, creeping closer to the mirror. I absentmindedly placed my fingertips under my eyes, praying to God that this wasn't real.

My eyes were a ghastly red; a bright, violent, bloody red. I had truly become the animal that I knew always I was. A new pain started to course through my body; not like the thirst, which had been a sudden, stabbing pain. This was far worse; the dull, throbbing pain coursed through not only my body, but my mind and spirit as well. The pain of guilt, of disappointment, of the absolute self-loathing that I had tried to come to terms with in London so many decades ago. I hung my head as I ran my fingers through my hair again.

I looked up at the couch and cringed, immediately wishing I had just stayed in my corner. Blood soaked the couch, drenching the leather and the poor boy. His head was twisted back at a strange angle and his brown hair was matted down from where I'd grabbed him. Even from across the room I could see the points where... where I'd bitten him. Teeth marks ran up his forearms and covered his neck and torso. The terrible venom ran through my mouth as I remembered giving him each and every one of those bites.

I shuddered, gripping the wall until the plaster crumbled as I once again fought to keep what humane side I had left. The terrifying thing was that even though most of me shuddered in terror and guilt, somewhere in the back of my mind I still shuddered in desire, desire for his blood. The boy's chest was dark crimson, so much blood covering it I couldn't tell if he was breathing or not. My breath hitched in my throat. _No, no, no, no, no, no, God no! I couldn't have killed him! Oh my God..._

I hung my head in my hands; I despised myself, I loathed myself, I couldn't live with myself. How could I have killed an innocent boy? Suddenly, a moan emerged from the twisted figure in front of me. I gasped and looked up as Edward started to twitch on the couch, his breathing got heavier. He was alive! I almost laughed out loud as I realized that I hadn't killed him. I approached the side of the couch as I saw his face scrunch up in discomfort.

I never left his side throughout the entire three days it took for him to change. He writhed and screamed as I tried my best to comfort him. I held his hand and whispered bits of apologies and poetry. At times his pain would bring me to silent tears, and I wondered if I had made a mistake, playing God like I had. But as I saw the young man he was becoming, as I saw the strength in his rapidly changing eyes, I forgot about any doubt I'd had. Eventually his pounding heart took off like a horse, beating at twice the normal speed. _This_ part of the transformation I remembered. It was very near the end, and it was by far the most painful. I watched as Edward groaned and arched his back against the wood table I had put him on. I had thrown the couch out, the last thing we needed was human blood lying around. His eyes grew wide as the green in them gave way to a horrifying blood-red, his teeth clenching and his fingernails driving into his palms. He gave one last final scream of agony and then he collapsed.

He was absolutely still. I crept closer him, child-like wonder enveloping me. Slowly, his eyes flickered open and I couldn't keep from smiling. He looked absolutely perfect; he'd be having far more trouble will the women at the hospital, _'Or anywhere for that matter.' _I added with a chuckle.

He looked absolutely terrified and confused; probably the absence of pain. I wondered briefly if the amount of blood in someone's body affects the amount of pain the venom causes. I bit my tongue, _'Dear God, I must have nearly killed him! But it just tasted so good...'_ venom flowed into my mouth, _'No. I have to be strong now, for him...'_

He looked up at me, "What in God's name is going on?" He stammered. He looked so surprised by the sound of his own voice, I couldn't help but laugh. I was just glad he was alright.

"Yes I am now just talk to me!" He yelled. I frowned; confused by his words. What was happening? Did he have abilities? I had heard of vampires with abilities but had never met one, much less thought I would-

"VAMPIRES? What in God's name do vampires have to do with anything?" Edward screamed. I sighed, he was special. I didn't really know how to deal with this, I honestly hadn't thought this far ahead.

"Well, Edward. I'm not sure how to explain this. You see, I am... well, we are... um, not exactly human..." I tried to think of how to word in when I noticed Edward staring at me, watching me think,

"We are vampires? How is that possible?" He asked softly. _'Of course!'_ I thought. He could see whatever I was thinking, words were not needed.

"Hmm... let me try something," I said. I closed me eyes and began to remember the night I was turned. I went through the entire experience, everything I could remember; though a lot of it was muddled through human vision. When I opened my eyes he was staring at me in awe.

"You see?" I asked, "I was turned many years ago, more than you would think, and now you are as I am. This is your first day of eternal life."

"What was all that?" He breathed.

"My past, Edward, I am 278 years old. I came here after traveling around from place to place…" I began to say more when I realized he wasn't even listening to me anymore, lost inside his own head. _'I've never had a son before,' _I thought to myself, smiling, _'This is going to be interesting.'_

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**A/N: I tried to end it with a bit of humor haha. Please, please review! Especially now that I can actually TELL when someone reviews and respond to them haha. Thanks so much for reading! IYD24**


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